It’s All About Family

Rediscovering the connections that hold us together.

As the holidays approach at what feels like lightning speed, I can’t help but pause and reflect on what truly matters. In a season filled with gifts, gatherings, and endless to-do lists, it’s easy to get swept up in the noise. But at the end of the day—during the holidays and all year long—it’s all about family.

And when I say family, I don’t just mean blood relatives. I’m talking about the people who have walked with us through life. The ones who show up. The ones who love us, challenge us, support us, laugh with us, and sometimes even cry with us. The brothers and sisters we grew up with, the cousins who feel like lifelong friends, the aunts and uncles who shaped us, the moms and dads who carried us, the grandparents whose wisdom echoes in our hearts. And yes—our friends who became family along the way.

As we continue on this journey we call life, one thing becomes very clear: we need each other.
Through the good times and the not-so-good times, through seasons of joy and seasons of struggle, we were never meant to walk this path alone.

Somewhere along the way, as technology advanced and life sped up, we lost a little bit of that connection. We became more plugged-in, but more disconnected. More reachable online, but harder to reach in real life. And honestly, that’s heartbreaking. I miss the old days sometimes—the days before constant notifications and WiFi, when conversations were face-to-face and time together felt slower, richer, more intentional.

But even as the world changes, one truth stays the same:
Family is where life happens.
Family is where memories are made.
Family is where we return when the world gets noisy.

I love my family—all of them. The ones related by blood and the ones bound by love. And this holiday season, I’m choosing to slow down, to reconnect, and to remember what matters most.

Because in the end, it really is all about family.

Cherished Saturdays

Every Saturday morning was a special ritual for the family. The air would be filled with the excitement of a new adventure, as one of the boys eagerly awaited their turn for the coveted one-on-one breakfast with Dad. With four energetic boys, a solo breakfast was a rare treat, a chance for uninterrupted conversation and undivided attention.

On one particular Saturday, it was the second oldest’s turn. He was thrilled to pick his favorite café for their morning meal. The café was a cozy little spot, with the smell of freshly brewed coffee mingling with the aroma of pancakes and bacon. The young boy, just seven years old, relished this quality time with his father.

After breakfast, the tradition continued with a visit to K-Mart. The highlight of the trip was always choosing a new Hot Wheel to add to his growing collection. The boy would carefully examine each car, weighing his options before selecting the perfect one.

As they were leaving the café that morning, the boy turned to his father with a mischievous glint in his eye and asked, “Dad, did you notice my socks?”

His father, sensing this was going to be an interesting conversation, replied, “Well, no, son, I didn’t.”

“Do you think anyone noticed my socks?” the boy asked, his curiosity piqued.

“Hmm, I don’t think so,” his father answered, intrigued by where this was heading.

The boy sat there, pondering for a moment, before asking, “Well, then, if you didn’t notice my socks and no one else noticed my socks, why does Mom make me change them all the time?”

His father couldn’t help but laugh at the boy’s innocent logic. It was moments like these that made the routine so precious. He explained with a chuckle, “Well, if you didn’t change your socks, there’s a good chance your feet would smell really bad!”

Both of them burst into laughter, sharing a moment of pure joy and understanding. It was in these simple, everyday moments that the bond between father and son grew stronger.

These Saturdays were not just about breakfast or new toys, but about creating lasting memories, sharing laughs, and cherishing the fleeting moments of childhood. As the years passed, and the boys grew older, these memories became a treasure trove of the past, reminding them to cherish every moment spent together.


Note: I wrote this one with tears streaming down face.

Reflecting on the Movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life”

Like millions of others, I’ve watched the classic film, It’s a Wonderful Life numerous times and I see why many would say it’s the best film ever.

It offers a sense of redemption and hope and love and the magic of Christmas. If we allow ourselves to remain at the surface level, we can walk away feeling uplifted.

Never one to take things only at face value, I’ve been digging deeper and asking a lot of questions, and I’ve questioned some of the “lessons” of the film.

What I’ve concluded is that there’s a very different message or lesson embedded in the film, at least for me. It’s clear in my mind, because we’ve just finished watching it.

Here’s what I’ve drawn from it:

It’s a meaningful life. Clearly, George Bailey’s life has meaning. He’s been a powerful force in the lives of everyone around him. His decisions and actions blessed countless others, and no doubt had a ripple effect beyond even what was revealed to him by Angel Second Class, Clarence.

It’s a significant life. No doubt George’s actions and decisions made a significant difference in the lives of others. He saved his brother, Harry, from drowning; Harry went on to save the lives of countless others in the war.

He followed in his father’s footsteps, keeping the Building and Loan alive after his father’s death. In so doing, he gave his uncle, Billy, purpose and work for a lifetime, and kept him on track in spite of his faulty memory.

He kept his love, Mary, from being a spinster librarian (actually – she would have chosen that path; she wasn’t naturally doomed to it).

He kept Mr. Gower, the pharmacist, from poisoning a little boy when he filled the prescription capsules with poison, rather than the appropriate medicine because he was lost in pain (and drink) from hearing of the death of his son.

He kept Bedford Falls from falling into the greedy, mean-spirited grasp of Mr. Potter, who would turn it into a wasteland of the dirtier, grittier, less-than-wholesome side of life and business.

He created a path for so many Bedford Falls residents to realize the dream of homeownership by offering reasonable financing and building options, otherwise unavailable to them. By extension, he gave them responsibility, pride, community, hope…

His union with Mary restored the life to a once-regal, broken down old home, and filled it with the laughter of four beautiful children.

And clearly, as the end of the movie so movingly demonstrates, all those whose lives he touched were willing and ready to come to his aid in his moment of need.

What gets to me though, is that George lived the life everyone else thought he should live. He played the roles everyone else assigned to him. In every instance, he took on the responsibility of others and subverted his own desires for adventure and architecture and building amazing structures.

He did the “right” things.

I have to ask: Was it really the “right” thing? Was it really the life he was intended to lead? Is the underlying lesson here that we should suck it up and go along and do what everyone else expects us to do? Does that lead to a full and satisfying life?

His actions allowed everyone else to life the lives of their dreams, while he stayed behind and held down the proverbial fort.

It reminds me of a series of television ads I saw a few years ago created by some financial services company. It showed a couple in their 60’s (you see this through the graying hair and age in their faces) who can “finally live the life you dreamed of” because they successfully reached “retirement age.” They could quit doing the life-sucking work they’d been sentenced to, and because they (presumably) planned and invested correctly, they could now go on adventures, explore the world, and take the time and space to be more creative in their lives.

But there’s no guarantee any of us will reach that age and that state of financial security. And I question why it needs to be that way? Why do we insist having “the safe job” and making the “right salary” is the path to happiness? If it fills your bank account while draining your soul, what’s the true value?

Was it, in fact, a good exchange?

You see, every moment you choose to do any thing, you are exchanging your precious and perishable life energy for whatever that thing is. You will not get any of those moments back. And I’m not convinced the meaning of life is to do all the things the way those who have gone before have done them or think we should do them.

I think we were created to be creative. I believe we were given unique skills, talents, ideas and desires to bring our creativity to life. I don’t believe the purpose of life is to endure and survive until we die!

So, yes… George Bailey undoubtedly lived a full, meaningful, powerful, and significant life. I can’t help but wonder what more he might have accomplished had he chosen differently and wrote his own ending. What greater impact he may have had had he spread his wings, traveled the world, and shared his gifts within a larger sphere. And who else might have stepped forward in Bedford Falls to be forces for good, so to speak, in his absence.

It will likely remain an unanswered question; just a potential storyline in the corners of my mind.

So, I leave you with these questions about you and your life:

  • What voice is speaking to you within the depths of your soul?
  • What whispers are you hearing (ignoring?) that call you to something more interesting, something more creative?
  • What do you long to explore, create, bring to life, and share with the world (even if it’s only in your little corner)?
  • Which path will you choose to follow?

And I wonder… do we really want the people who have made a meaningful difference in our lives to have to wait until the end of theirs – or til crisis rears its ugly head – to let them know what they mean to us? Is there someone who would benefit from hearing, in simple language, just what they mean to you or how what seemed like a small act of kindness changed the course of your day or your life?

One of my mentors said, “How do you know if someone needs to be encouraged?… If they are breathing!” It’s true… we could all use more kind words, more acknowledgement of the value we bring. I challenge you to start a new practice and let the people around you know what they mean to you more often and how much you appreciate their efforts on your behalf.

We are on the brink of a new year… and the truth is, in any given moment, we can make a new choice about who we will be, what we will choose to do, and what we might have to offer.

I hope you choose thoughtfully. I hope you choose honestly. I hope you choose with courage and bravery.

You see… whatever it is that you were created to bring to the world is truly singular and unique to you. No one else in all of time has the power to do that one thing but you. And if you choose to remain on autopilot, if you choose to follow the path defined for you by someone else, if you choose to not show up and share it… It will NOT be. We will not have it.

And that would be a disservice. We will all be lesser for it.

Blessings to you all this holiday season. Whatever your spiritual or religious beliefs and practices may be, I send you light and love, peace and joy, health and wealth, and hopes for deeper connection, more meaning and richness… for prosperity and healing in the New Year!

A Christmas Reflection for Metlakatla

Rediscovering Christmas: The Gift of Giving and Faith

How’s your Christmas shopping coming along – has it sucked the Christmas spirit right out of you? Trying to find the perfect gifts for the ones I love sometimes threatens to rob me of my Christmas joy. I’ve heard that the tradition of giving gifts is based on the wise men in the Christmas story, but I believe we want to give good gifts because we are made in the image of THE Giver, the King of Glory who gives Himself to us.

Think about it: God created the world to give it to man, the ones to whom He gave His own image! And ever since then, He’s been pouring out gifts of all kinds, both necessities and blessings – life, light, hope, faith. When we were ungrateful and rebellious, He gave His Son to redeem us and His Spirit to empower us. Every day God gives us everything we need to live victoriously. The unchanging God is the giver of all good things (James 1:17), and we’re made to be like Him.

Even knowing all that, sometimes I need to revisit Luke’s account of the worshiping wise men to retain my joy. These pagan scholars from the East studied the stars but knew about the prophecies of a coming King. So when one unique, gloriously brilliant star appeared in the sky, they noticed. Believing it to be the herald of God’s promised gift, the wise men left their old lives behind and set out to worship the promised Gift of God. After months of arduous, desert travel, they arrived in Jerusalem and began asking questions.

The news of their arrival prompted the earthly king to call on the local religious scholars for details about this prophesied King. The Jewish leaders quickly came to share their vast knowledge. They loved the respect and riches studying the Word brought to them, but they had no desire for that Word to come to life and disrupt their status quo. Unlike the wise men who traveled far and left their old lives behind, these fools – living just six miles from the King’s birthplace – clung to their way of life and missed the actual Gift of God.

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